only me

ok.. so I have been known to be a tad.. clumsy.. all random stuff to.. when I was young I dressed up in garbage bags and went roller skating down our big hill in our neighbourhood.. bailed and had to be taken to the emergency room with a green stick fracture.. in garbage bags..  I am sure my mom loved me for that one..  than a week later I was chasing boys in this huge unlogged area in our neighbourhood.. he started chasing me down the hill and I fell and slid head first into a giant log.. again. emergency room.. moving on a couple years..I thought it would be fun on christmas eve to jump off this desk and try and catch a wooden beam in our basement.. wondering how to get back to the desk easier so I could keep swinging back to the desk with out hitting the floor..I had the genius thought that if I tried to grab the bar with my hands facing me.. I could somehow grab it and come back.. umm no.. I ended up free flying past the bar and cracked my forehead on this piece of cement stair.. again.. stiches.. I also had my best friend leave her glass on my bedroom floor.. and I ran in .. because I never walk anywhere.. I have to run up stairs and in my house.. and I ran right over it and put it through my foot.. more stitches.. than moving onto serving at Bostons. I thought I would be nice and help a fellow server out and bring a refill for them. I caught the glass on the edge of the metal counter and shattered the glass into my middle finger.. you guessed it stitches.. all random stuff that could have easily been prevented.. today I reminded myself of all that crazy stuff.. when towards the end of the night.. I was walking towards my friend James at the server station.. and I thought.. why not smack his ass?? its friday night.. I have had my Red Bull.. he is gay.. so he wont take it the wrong way.. I wound up.. than proceeded to  rolled my ankle.. fall into his ass while still trying to smack it.. and ended up clipping my middle finger on his keys that he apparantly keeps in his pocket.. instant blue vein bulges through my middle finger.. and is throbbing.. not going to lie.. i got scared.. wanted to transfer my tables and go kind of scared.. my middle finger is now bulging and I cannot bend it.. and the vein is finally going back into place.. and I am hoping I wake up tomorow with a nice flesh coloured finger.. 

seriously.. what is wrong with me..